Updated: Jan 28
Are you looking for love and not having any luck? Would you like to become more aware of your dating mistakes? If you want to find a great relationship, read on. When you are single and dating, you probably hear other singles talking about some of the dating problems that keep them from meeting someone. When you listen to any of the following, you too might think there's no hope. Dating Mistake #1: Thinking there isn't anyone "out there". This is one of the first reasons people give for not dating. If you believe this, you've given up before trying. This is an excuse for not dating; for not taking responsibility for attracting dates; and for being a "victim" of your age, looks, or circumstances. Note: There is ALWAYS someone out there to date. You will and you can meet someone wonderful. Dating Mistake #2: Believing you must compromise. Some situations require give and take, but finding a special someone doesn't mean you have to compromise on chemistry or important values. That type of compromise is called "settling", which will never be the relationship you want. Note: If you feel you have to settle, ask yourself how you can improve your single life. Make yourself so happy, you would never think of compromising your wonderful life. Dating Mistake #3: Thinking you need to look "perfect". People think they can't start dating until they lose weight, get some plastic surgery, or buy a new wardrobe. What they think about how they look has become their roadblock to finding a partner. The more they believe their reasons, the more they stay stuck. Note: People fall in love- and stay in love-every day who are your age, weight, or height, wearing all types of apparel. Nothing has to prevent you from having a relationship except you. Dating Mistake #4: Believing you need a lot of money and things. Women who barter their looks and youth for a man of wealth are never going to be happy. Someday they will want to discover who they are as individuals, or, they will worry about the younger competition. The men will worry about losing their money, or, that she will find a younger man. Note: You don't need wealth as much as you need to know how to take care of your personal life. Living BELOW your means doing a job you feel proud of is attractive. Dating Mistake #5: Believing in rejection. The old "fear of rejection" myth causes people to settle for less than they want; keeps people "house-bound"; and causes people to push others away because they don't want to get "hurt again." Note: How do you stop the myth of rejection from stealing your dating life? Get out often, with consistency and determination. Be friendly, talk to people, and share who you are. Then, you'll have choices. When you have choices, you won't feel "rejected" if you don't hit it off with everyone you meet. Dating Mistake #6: Worrying your baggage will scare others away. It's not the baggage from the past that bothers people as much as how you have dealt with it. You will be admired if you handle your challenges responsibly; understood if you no longer engage in destructive behavior; and forgiven if you have unpacked your baggage by working with a counselor. Note: Yes, people do look at your past as a recommendation for your trustworthiness. However, it is who you have become by learning from your past and who you are now that can make you a treasure to know. Do you make other dating mistakes that keep you from finding love? Dig deep. Find your dating misconceptions and fears and get some help in facing them.
Visit https://www.deartonja.com/ for more tips, skills, videos and insight on dating, relationships, singles, and love. Copyright 2020, Tonja Weimer.